My shadow and I
By
Dr. G. Rauf Roashan
My shadow and I were running away
From each other
The sun would bring us together
And it would also push us apart
Sometimes I would end up shorter
And sometimes my shadow
If I spoke,
If I laughed
If I hummed
He was silent
When my heart pounded
My arteries pulsed
His heart did not beat
His arteries did not pulse
Many times I walked behind him
Many times he walked behind me
And sometimes by my side
I didn’t truly know him, nor did he know me
And when I fell in love
My shadow would run away from me
It wanted to walk behind my love
But I would be quicker
My shadow would appear by my side
And later in front of me
It wanted to tell me that my back was to the sun
I used to tell him
My sun is different
Later I was afraid of it
I was afraid it would expose
The secrets of my heart
My heart’s secrets were love and devotion
People were drowned in lust
In deceit
They did not care for love or faithfulness
These were commodities nobody bought
And if anyone possessed them
He would be laughed at
They would evict him and his shadow
From the garden
They would take his flowers away
And pluck away their petals on dust
Their verdict would be a life in hell
For his crime of taking in esteem
Love and devotion
And the longings of his heart
At a time like that, my shadow would burn with wrath
It would become shorter and then longer
It would run away from the sun
It would seek a shadow to melt in
And in the dark shadow
It would pull me in
And take me in its arms
And my shadow and I would become one
And would know each other for the very first time